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家长如何应对孩子青春期的叛逆
日期:2017-01-12 14:32:25 来源:www.jnzyxlzx.com

  处于青春叛逆期的孩子心理问题颇多,性情也很容易出现反差,不仅会出现各种行为问题,比如厌学、退学、早恋、过早性行为、怀孕、考试焦虑、网瘾、吸毒;情绪障碍问题,比如焦虑、抑郁,甚至有些孩子出现幻觉、妄想等不同程度的精神问题。深圳青少年心理咨询提醒:如果家长不及时拯救青春期的孩子,孩子的心理、精神健康很容易出现问题,性格、行为出现扭曲,影响今后一生的发展和幸福。咨询

  In a lot of psychological problems of children youth rebellion, temperament is also very easy to contrast, not only there will be a variety of behavioral problems, such as weariness, drop out, puppy love, premature sexual behavior, pregnancy, test anxiety, addiction, drug abuse; emotional disorder, such as anxiety, depression, and even some children have mental problems of different degree of illusion, delusion. Shenzhen youth counseling reminder: if the parents do not timely rescue adolescent children, psychological and mental health of children is prone to problems, personality and behavior appear distorted, and affect the development of the happy life in the future.

  青春期叛逆少年的学习问题、行为问题、情绪问题、心理状态往往跟孩子的成长经历,尤其是跟家庭环境、与父母的关系有关。面对孩子表现出来的表面问题,父母首先需要了解孩子心理、行为形成的原因,有针对性的去改变和调整。由于青春期孩子心理比较特殊,在与孩子的互动中,父母需要牢记以下原则。

  Adolescent rebellious teenager's learning problems, behavior problems, emotional problems, mental state is often associated with the child's growth experience, especially with the family environment, the relationship with their parents. In the face of the children show the surface of the problem, parents need to understand the child's psychological and behavioral reasons, targeted to change and adjust. Due to the special psychology of adolescent children, in interaction with the child, parents need to bear in mind the following principles.

  一、关心但不干涉

  One, care but no interference

  青春期的孩子有时候会比较冲动,内心有一种“成人感”,觉得自己已经长大了,但他们的现实能力水平并没有达到成熟的地步,很多父母作为客观者会担心孩子因此而受伤或遭遇挫折,担心孩子而去干涉或控制孩子的行为,这往往会激起孩子的反抗。比如孩子晚上要去朋友家玩,如果家长强硬地指责说:“都几点了还玩!玩能玩进大学吗?9点必须回来!”如此让孩子觉得被干涉了自由和隐私,自然会更叛逆。家长可以说“天都黑了,不要去危险的地方好吗?否则妈妈会担心的。”孩子或许因为一定的理由而选择去,但一定会考虑到妈妈的关心而早一点儿回家。

  Adolescent children are sometimes more impulsive, the heart has a "grown-up", feels that he has grown up, but their real ability level has not reached a mature stage, many parents worry that their children will serve as an objective so injured or suffered setbacks, fear of children and to interfere or control the child's behavior, this children tend to stir up rebellion. For example, the children want to go to a friend's house at night to play, if the parents strongly accused said! Can you play in college? Must be back at 9!" So let the children feel that being interfered with freedom and privacy, will naturally be more rebellious. Parents can say, "the sky is dark, do not go to a dangerous place? Otherwise mother will worry." The child may choose to go for a certain reason, but he will take care of his mother and come home early.

  二、放低家长的姿态

  Two, put down the attitude of the parents

  青少年的内心有种“成人感”,渴望自己的想法、行为、态度得到周围人的认可,如果父母还是把他们当成小孩子去对待,他们自然会用不成熟的方式来回应、反抗父母,比如上学要父母哄,不哄不求就不去;不讲道理,说话不算数,等等。

  Teenagers have a "adult", for his thoughts and behavior, attitude recognition of people around, if parents still regard them as children to treat, they will naturally use immature ways to respond to, such as school to rebel against their parents, parents do not coax coax, do not seek not to speak; truth, speak not count, etc.

  孩子已经有了独立的人格和思想,父母不应该把他们当孩子看,更不要用高高在上的姿态去跟孩子说话。家长应尝试把孩子作为一个大人一样去尊重、去关心,用平等的态度和他们探讨最佳亲子相处模式。

  The children have independent personality and thought, parents should not take them as children, not a superior attitude to talk with their children. Parents should try to treat the child as an adult to respect and care for them, and to explore the best way to get along with them.

  三、注意对孩子的评价

  Three, pay attention to the evaluation of the child

  生理上的快速成熟、第二性征的出现会打破孩子原有的内心平衡,面对青春期的变化,他们会感到困惑和惶恐,自然会把一部分注意力从新聚集到自己的内心,再次思考“我是谁?”“我是一个怎样的人,想成为一个怎样的人”……在这个时期他们会非常在意别人对他的看法和评价。如果父母、老师、同伴给了过多的负面评价,会让孩子形成较差的自我评价,逐渐对自己失去自信心,同时积累各种负面情绪,出现行为问题、情绪问题或精神障碍。

  The rapid physiological maturity, secondary sexual characteristics of the child will break the original inner balance, facing the changes of adolescence, they may feel confused and fear, will naturally take some of the attention from the new aggregation into your heart, think again, "who am I?“ ”What kind of person I am, what kind of person I want to be"…… During this time they will be very concerned about others' opinions and comments on him. If parents, teachers and peers to negative evaluation too much, let the children form poor self evaluation, gradually lose confidence in themselves, while the accumulation of various negative emotions, behavior problems, emotional problems or mental disorder.

  因此,对于青春期的孩子应以鼓励为主,对其评价要客观、有建设性,帮他们培养自尊心和自我价值感。这个时期的孩子非常渴望获得成就感,如果学业不好,往往会让他们自暴自弃,或选择其他方式来获得心理的满足,比如网络游戏、“创业争取”等。

  Therefore, for the adolescent children should be encouraged to the evaluation of their objective and constructive, to help them develop self-esteem and self-worth. This child is very eager to get a sense of achievement, if the school is not good, often let them up, or choose another way to get psychological satisfaction, such as online games, "entrepreneurship for" etc.

  如果孩子出现了一些行为问题、情绪问题,甚至有严重的心理问题,比如精神分裂症、抑郁症、焦虑症等,父母一方面要及时带孩子到正规的心理咨询中心寻求帮助,及时改善状况,另一方面父母不要给孩子贴上标签,以免加重孩子的问题。

  If the child has some behavioral problems, emotional problems, and even have serious psychological problems, such as schizophrenia, depression, anxiety, parents to take their child to a regular psychological counseling center to seek help, to improve the situation, on the other hand, parents do not give children labeled, so as not to aggravate the child the problem.

  青少年心理健康专家提醒:为何孩子叛逆期行为会有所变化,就是因为孩子的心理产生了变化,想要拯救他们一定要从心理层面入手。如果孩子不配合父母,或跟父母的关系比较紧张,父母最好寻求心理专家的帮助;如果孩子出现严重的行为问题、情绪问题或精神问题,父母要及时寻求经验丰富的擅长青少年心理咨询的咨询师的帮助,孩子的成长发展速度非常迅速,错过了关键时期或拖太久,对孩子今后的影响会更大,解决起来也会更加棘手。

  Young people's mental health experts to remind: why children rebellious behavior will change, because the child's psychological change, want to save them must start from the psychological level. If the child does not meet the parents, or the relationship with their parents more nervous, the best parents seek psychological expert help; if the child behavior problems, serious emotional problems or mental problems, parents should promptly seek experienced at youth counseling consultants to help children grow and develop very rapidly, missed the key time or wait too long, have a bigger impact on children in the future, will be more difficult to solve.


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